Finding lasting love is one of the best feelings in life, but for some, the decision to tie the knot is downright scary. If you and your significant other have started to discuss the future of your relationship, you may be grappling with thoughts and concerns regarding marriage.
Some folks will tell you that you’ll “just know” when you’ve met “the one,” but this isn’t always the case. If you’re on the fence about making a long-term commitment, you’re certainly not alone. Luckily, we’re obsessed with all things love-related here at Couples Candy, so we’ve done our research, put our heads together, and compiled a list of 30 surefire signs you should marry your significant other.
Ready to decide if your partner is marriage material? Great! Let’s dive in!
1. You Feel Completely Free to Be Yourself
There’s nothing quite like being in the company of someone who accepts and loves you just as you are. With the right partner, you can relax, be 100% authentic, and never feel the need to hide your feelings or put on a show. You can voice your opinions and concerns openly without fear of judgment.
If your partner is enamored with you—quirks and all—you have likely found a keeper!
2. You Don’t Feel the Need to Change Your Partner
It’s an excellent sign if you love the person you’re with and have no desire to change him. As humans, we’re ever-evolving, but folks who strive to transform their significant others into better partners almost always wind up heartbroken.
To lay the groundwork for a healthy long-term relationship, both parties must accept and appreciate their partner—flaws and all. Relationships should never be a DIY project.
3. Your Partner Prioritizes Together Time
Even in the most chaotic of times, every couple needs to spend quality time together. According to Psychology Today, it’s important that time spent together is positive and enjoyable for both partners.
It’s an excellent sign that your relationship is headed in the right direction if your partner is committed to spending time with you on a regular basis. Both parties should be involved in the decision-making process when making plans. If you prefer different activities, take turns planning date nights. Chances are, you’ll find a few activities you both enjoy.
4. Your Relationship is Built on Openness and Honesty
Vulnerability can be incredibly difficult, even in committed relationships. If you can be open and honest with your partner with no fear of judgment, chances are he’s a good egg.
Virtually everyone needs some level of privacy, but privacy and secrecy are two completely different animals. When we keep secrets, we’re actively hiding information we don’t want out in the open, which makes maintaining an intimate relationship next to impossible.
If you and your partner are open and honest with one another even when the topic is uncomfortable, you have a strong foundation for a long, happy life together.
5. Your Partner Trusts You
As mentioned above, openness and honesty are key components in any healthy relationship. Mutual trust is essential, as ongoing doubts and jealousy can ruin even the most promising partnerships.
Hashing out any insecurities early on can help keep problems at bay. If you’re struggling with the fact that your girlfriend is still friends with her ex, talk to her about it! Getting things out in the open will start a positive trend in your relationship.
6. Your Partner is Reliable and Responsive
In a committed relationship, you should never have to worry about your partner going off the grid. Sure, your sweetie may not reply to every text message or phone call immediately, but if she values your relationship, you know you can count on her to reply as soon as she can.
If you don’t have the most responsive partner, you might want to have an open and honest conversation before taking your relationship to the next level.
7. You’re Content
Butterflies, excitement, and anticipation are fun in the beginning stages of a romance, but it’s a deep and consistent sense of connection and contentment that make for a lasting relationship.
If you feel at ease about your partnership whether you’re in the same room or miles apart, you should probably hold onto your sweetheart.
8. You Have Shared Dreams and Values
It’s true that opposites often attract, but differing values and dreams for the future can lead to disaster. Before making a long-term commitment, it’s important for couples to discuss what’s most important to them looking forward. Every partnership is different… One duo might prioritize starting a family, while another might opt to travel the globe together.
When you can’t imagine going through life without your partner, and your dreams and values align, there’s a good chance you’ve found the one.
9. You Have Fun Together
From inside jokes to playful banter and carefree moments together, if fun is a key ingredient in your relationship, it has staying power! There are certainly times that call for serious conversation, but coming back to humor is a surefire way to keep things lively between you and your future spouse.
Some great ways to have fun with your partner? Get active, schedule fun dates so you always have something to look forward to, and try new activities! Focus on making your life together an adventure!
10. You Can Agree to Disagree
Disagreements are healthy in any relationship. No two people will agree 100% of the time, so it’s essential that both partners feel free to share their viewpoints while engaging in a mature debate.
Some individuals enjoy healthy conflict, but arguments are a source of stress for others. If you and your significant other “fight fair” and both feel heard and understood during and after disagreements, you’ve probably met your match.
11. Your Partner is Open to Feedback
Overcoming problems in a relationship requires both partners acknowledging the fact that they’re not always right. On occasion, you may need to discuss difficult topics or let your partner know when something is bothering you, and how he responds is a good indication of his willingness to adapt and make positive change.
If your potential spouse is receptive to constructive feedback, he could be marriage material!
12. You Support—But Don’t Smother—Each Other
Being part of a couple is great when both partners maintain their autonomy. Problems often arise when one partner is clingy and/or needy and relies on the other to meet every emotional need.
Couples who offer each other mutual support have a great chance of making their relationship work long term.
13. You Feel Comfortable Making Long-Term Plans
Many people in rocky relationships are constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop. This chaotic dynamic makes it difficult to find contentment, and making long-term plans may seem scary or even taboo.
Folks in healthy, committed relationships include each other in their future plans. If you and your beau have a bucket list for two, he’s probably the right guy for you!
14. Your Personalities Complement Each Another
Everyone knows that opposites tend to attract, as we’re drawn to people who experience life in new and exciting ways. While differences can certainly cause challenges, complementary personalities are often better suited for one another than similar personalities. Why? Our differences keep things fun and interesting, and they allow us to see the world from our partner’s perspective.
If you’re an introvert and your significant other is more extroverted, allow her to push you out of your comfort zone, and be sure to let her know that you need plenty of downtime as well. It’s all about balance.
15. Your Partner Pays Attention to the Little Things
When life gets busy and you and your significant other are running in different directions, it’s important to connect by acknowledging the little things. Getting a “you’ve got this” text from your partner on the morning of a big presentation shows that you’re on her mind despite her hectic schedule.
Whether your girl surprises you with breakfast from your favorite bakery, or leaves a note in your car telling you she misses you, pay attention to the sweet things she does for you. It doesn’t take a big gesture to make our significant others feel loved.
16. You Have Great Sexual Chemistry
The physical connection you have with your partner will help strengthen your emotional bond and keep things fresh and exciting. Sexually, you and your sweetie should be open to discussing your needs and desires.
As with every other aspect of a romantic relationship, communication is key when it comes to sex. Is your partner receptive when you suggest a new position or ask her to try something you’ve always wanted to do? If so, hold onto her!
17. You Both Express Love in Ways Your Partner Appreciates
You’ve probably heard of The 5 Love Languages, but if you and your partner haven’t taken the couple’s quiz, now is the time! You’ll learn how you both express and receive love, which can help take your relationship to the next level.
By taking the quiz, you and your sweetheart will learn if you prefer to receive love through words of affirmation, receiving gifts, physical touch, acts of service, and/or quality time.
18. Your Partner is Kind and Generous
According to psychologist and relationship guru John Gottman, kindness acts like glue in romantic relationships. When our partners are kind and loving, we feel appreciated, understood, and validated. Best of all, people who are on the receiving end of kindness and generosity on a regular basis tend to be kinder, too.
If you and your partner are kind to one another in good times and in bad, it might be time to get hitched!
19. Your Partner is Your Biggest Fan
When you have great news to share, is your partner the first person you call? Does he celebrate your successes and point out your strengths? If so, it sounds like you have a cheerleader on your hands! Having a supportive partner is essential for long-term love and happiness.
John Gottman’s research suggests that scanning our environments for opportunities to appreciate and praise our partners is a key ingredient in lasting relationships, and we couldn’t agree more!
If your guy isn’t afraid to tell you he’s proud of you and he sings your praises to others, a trip down the aisle could be in your not-so-distant future!
20. You Can’t Imagine Doing Life with Anyone Else
When you look into the future and can’t see a life with anyone but your partner, take it as a sign that you two could be one another’s endgame. Many long-term couples share an unexplainable connection that first drew them together—and keeps them together.
Do you and your partner have a special bond you simply can’t explain? If you’re both in agreement that you’re “it” for each other, don’t take it for granted, and enjoy this ride we call life—together!
21. You Love Spending Time Together
If you love spending time with your partner regardless of what that time entails, you’ve probably found your match. When we’re in love, we just want to be close to the person we care about most, whether we’re reading side-by-side, snuggled up watching a movie, or perusing the grocery store aisles for tonight’s dinner.
When you’re with the right person, you’re content just being together, and prolonged silence doesn’t phase you. Pay close attention to how you feel when you and your significant other are just hanging out. If you’re perfectly at ease, continue to enjoy that comfort—and each other—long term.
22. Your Partner Knows What to Do When You’re in a Bad Mood
Some folks need space when they’ve had a bad day, while others need an extra dose of love and affection. Learning to read our partners’ needs when they’re in a bad mood—or simply feeling blue—will help catapult the relationship in the right direction.
If your significant other gives you what you need when you’re not at your best, she’s probably a keeper. As Domenico Cieri once said, “To know when to go away and when to come closer is the key to any lasting relationship.”
If you two are still in the beginning stages of your partnership, a conversation about your needs could play a key role in learning to understand each other.
23. You’re There for Each Other in Challenging Times
Life throws us all curveballs, and having a caring partner to help us through those difficult times is priceless. If you’ve been with your significant other for any amount of time, you’ve probably gotten through some trials together.
How your partner has handled tough times in the past is a good indication of how she’ll handle challenges in the future. Is she calm, cool, collected, and always there if you need a shoulder to lean on? If so, you two will be able to face anything life throws at you.
24. Your Partner Doesn’t Shut Down or Leave During a Fight
At some point, all couples argue. It’s how those arguments play out that you should pay attention to. If your partner remains calm and present and is willing to listen to your point of view, you’re dating a fantastic human. If he calls you names, completely shuts down, or leaves mid-conversation, it will be difficult, if not impossible, to come to a resolution.
Sometimes, couples need to take a breather to calm down and collect their thoughts before returning to the argument. Let your partner know that keeping things civil is important to you, and you’d much rather take a timeout than make hurtful statements you’ll both regret.
25. Your Partner Has Maintained Long-Term Relationships
If your significant other’s best friends are her besties from childhood, she has a great track record when it comes to long-term relationships. Your partner’s friendships and family dynamic could give you some insight as to how she handles differences of opinion, conflicts, etc.
Does your sweetie enjoy regular girls’ night out? Does she make plans with family members and help out when a friend is in need? These are great indicators that she values and prioritizes the people she loves.
26. You Take Care of Each Other
It’s nice to know there’s someone who cares when we’re not feeling our best. Whether you’re battling the flu or just feeling mentally drained, if your partner offers to make you soup, pick up your meds, or binge-watch your favorite show, he’s definitely invested.
There’s an added layer of contentedness in a relationship when both parties know their partner will be there for them when they’re not feeling up to par.
27. Your Partner is Kind to Strangers
The way your partner treats complete strangers is a telltale sign of his character. If he’s kind to servers and cashiers, and he strikes a balance between being kind and assertive when necessary, you can expect to be treated with endless kindness and respect.
Your partner being ambivalent towards strangers doesn’t necessarily have to be a dealbreaker. Some folks simply need a wakeup call. Just be sure to be kind when broaching this sensitive topic.
28. Your Partner Keeps You Posted
Does your partner check in before heading home from a night out with friends? Keeping you in the loop is a sign of respect—and proof you’ve been on her mind despite being out with her girlfriends.
People in secure partnerships are more than happy to give each other space, but it’s nice to know when you cross your mind from time to time. A thoughtful partner will keep her significant other up-to-speed on changes in plans, etc.
29. Your Partner is Mature when Necessary
There’s never a dull moment with a fun, charismatic significant other, but it’s important that your future spouse know when to tap into his mature side. If he enjoys hanging out with the guys but doesn’t stay out all night, he’s probably a catch.
Long-term relationships are typically successful when there’s the perfect blend of serious and silly. You and your partner are on the right path if you strike that balance together.
30. You’re Willing to Pay the “Price of Admission” to Be with Your Partner
No two people are 100% compatible. Your partner likely has quirks and habits that get on your nerves, and you undoubtedly irk him from time to time. Sex and relationship expert Dan Savage encourages couples to accept each other’s flaws as the price of admission to be with that person. For instance? Dan’s husband, Terry, doesn’t tidy up after himself. Initially, Terry’s lack of organization drove his partner up the wall, but one day, Dan realized he’d need to accept that Terry wasn’t a neat freak if the relationship had a chance. Dan decided to focus on Terry’s positive traits rather than his flaws, and the two have now been married for many years.
If none of your partner’s quirks and imperfections are deal breakers and you’re willing to pay the price of admission to be with him, make a point to zero in on everything you love about him, and don’t dwell on those petty annoyances.
Still on the Fence? Make a List!
Now that you’ve pored over the 30 telltale signs you should marry your significant other, you may have a better idea as to whether you two should say “I do.” If you’re still undecided, the relationship may need more time to grow and evolve; however, putting pen to paper may help you make one of the most important decisions of your life.
Make a list of the qualities you value most in a potential spouse, then jot down any dealbreakers. Does your partner have most of the qualities you value? Do any of his traits or behaviors go against your values? Sometimes transcribing our thoughts and feelings from our minds to paper can bring us the clarity we need to make life-altering decisions.
Most importantly, enjoy your relationship in the stage it’s in now, and don’t rush it. If you and your partner are in a loving, committed partnership, taking the time necessary to decide if marriage is in your future will be a given. After all, you two are living life together—and that’s what truly matters.